Open Letter to My Girls

Dear Girl1 and Girl2,

First, I still can’t believe, Girl2, you will be 5 on Tuesday.  That is crazy to me.  What is even crazier is that, Girl1, you will be 15 soon.  You are both entering big phases in your lives, one entering Kindergarten and one entering High School.  Both of you have so much in front of you, and I know you will both do the best you can do.

I wanted to take a moment and just let you both know how much you are loved.  I don’t think I could have asked for two better daughters for me.  I want you both to know how proud I am of both of you.  Girl1, you have a great grasp of who you are, and are not afraid to show it. I admire that very much in you.  Girl2, you are following in those footsteps.  You have no issues showing your personality, and also have a great grasp of your own limits.  I don’t think I have ever seen any other 4 year old put themselves in a time out because they were frustrated.

I know both of you strong willed females will make your own decisions in life, and no one will be able to stop you.  We all have to live and learn in our own ways, which includes making our own mistakes.  Don’t forget to grab a life lesson from each mistake or else you made the mistake for nothing and chances are really good you will make the same one again.

Celebrate your successes that you have.  It doesn’t matter how small it may seem, still celebrate each and every one.  Any reason to be happy and spread good news is a good one.

Trust your instincts.  You will meet lots of new people and be put in so many situations.  If something tells you that something is wrong, it probably is.  Don’t be afraid to act upon a gut feeling.  I can honestly tell you in most of the bad things I have gone through in my life there was a little voice telling me to get out.  I didn’t listen, and maybe you won’t either at first, but learn to trust yourself.

Love your body.  Do not let anyone tell you different.  It is part of who you are and you are beautiful.  You will have your moments of insecurity, but do not let it eat you alive.  Be proud of who you are, and always know how beautiful.

Love as hard as you can.  Love so hard that it feels like your whole body is going to explode with love.  Don’t worry about things like length of time or if it is the right person.  When you feel it, run with it like a kite and the beach and watch it fly.

Don’t be afraid of getting your heart broken.  It will happen, and it will happen more than once.  It will feel like the end of the world, but I assure you it isn’t.  You will cry and maybe not change your clothes, and that’s okay, but don’t let it close you off to one of the best emotions we can feel.  It will get better and there is no time limit.  You will know when it is time to move forward.  Just remember to move forward.  

Make friends.  Open yourself up to other people.  You both have such a great shine to you, and it is a shine the world needs to see.  Some may go, you may go, but there may be one or two that will stand by you for many, many, years.  I can tell you that these friends will be just as close as family and your relationship just as important.

I know it may seem hard to believe right now, but in the future you two will be best friends.  I know there is a large age difference, but over time that will matter less and less.  There is 16 years between me and your aunt, and I could never imagine life without her.  Love each other so hard.  You will need each other time and time again.

Thank you both for understanding I am not perfect.  Let that be one of the first lessons you take away, because no one is perfect.  We are all scratched, dented, bruised, and scraped.  It is these things that make us all beautiful and unique.  Embrace these imperfections and own them.  Don’t let bad decisions define who you are because they won’t make you a bad person.  It just makes you human and a student of life.  

Make bad decisions.  Just don’t kill or physically hurt anyone.  That may make you kinda bad.  Just learn from them.

If someone hurts you once, think about the reasons why they did it before you let them back into your life.  Sometimes we just can’t help but hurt those that we love (or even don’t love, but you know what I mean).  If you can justify it, then forgive.  Forgiveness is so very important in this journey.  Forgiveness isn’t just for other people, but also for yourself.  Always remember to forgive yourself.

If someone hurts you twice, get them out of your life.  Never accept a situation where someone puts their hands on you.  If that happens, even once, get out.  Do not be afraid, and do not allow them to convince you that it will never happen again.  It will.

I love you both so much.  I cannot wait to see the beautiful, strong, women you will both become and I will be cheering you on from the sidelines as you start your journeys.  I will also be here to listen and comfort you when you need it, maybe even when all you want is for me to go away.  

One more thing before I go – Read.  Read everything you can.  

Love,

Mom

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